10 down, 28 to go

Radiation is not so bad. Just a long x-ray (about 2 minutes or so). Really. Until they don't get you positioned properly and you have to lay on that hard table in a cold room in an awkward and uncomfortable position for, oh, say, 45 minutes!!!

My first week of radiation was exhausting, which I am accrediting to two things: (1) a head cold struck about Sunday before I started treatment on Monday, and (2) I didn't know what to expect or how I'd react, and I was really keyed up about it when I started. And I'll give honorable mention to the fact that I started my aromatase inhibitor (Femara) a week or so beforehand. Evidently one of the most common side effects is muscle aches!!! By Wednesday morning, I was aching and exhausted, and had a little meltdown because I wondered how I would manage 38 treatments when I felt this bad after only 2.

So I spent last week sleeping, getting to work, clock out for radiation, radiation, clock back in to work, lunch (and a little rest) at home, back to work, home again, sleep. Repeat. The cold is better after a lot of rest at home last weekend and a few hours at work to make up some time and try to get caught up a bit. And this week has been pretty much the same, except for the Breast Cancer Support Group meeting Tuesday evening, and mostly I've felt better the second week than the first.

Then it was Thursday morning. I had gotten up feeling pretty emotional anyway, but when my positioning was wrong and it took so long to get me situated, the tears just rolled down my cheeks. OK, fine, radiation over, we figured out what went wrong and how to prevent it in the future. But I just couldn't pull myself together. So I went home about lunchtime and stayed there, resting, recharging, revitalizing.

And Friday was a good day. I realized how lucky I am when I asked my new buddy-in-radiation how many visits HE had left. The reply? "I don't know." He started radiation the same day I did, and will find out Monday when he sees Dr. Perez-Tamayo how many visits he'll have total. Monday I'm going to introduce myself properly, as he's been a spot of sunshine in a waiting room that's been less than cozy a lot of times. And I'm going to make more of an effort to chat, as I realize my magazine is as much a shield of self-protection as it is self-entertainment, and the new chick (who's probably close to 90!) could probably use a radiation buddy as well.

I slept in this morning, and am taking my time getting going. These are all the things I'm told I'll NEED, but the truth is it's cold and windy and overcast outdoors, so who cares about getting dressed and out? I'm going to, though, because I want to go to work and give myself a false sense of being caught up. There's one folder of paperwork that needs my attention, and a day of route slips that need posting. And I'm going to spend some quality time cardmaking; it rebuilds me on an altogether different level.

Funny, I just realized how little I've talked about Al throughout this process. But you all know he's always great to me. I gave him a 'bye' on accompanying me to the radiologist; I'm sure it takes him back to his own experience as a patient, and we know the drill. He just vacuumed for me, and has been regularly rebooting the dishes or the laundry or whatever needs doing. I try to cook casseroles, soups, and such on the weekends, so he has choices for meals during the week. He's learning all about the joys of arthritis, so if you have any recommendations, pass them along.

And thanks for your support. On whatever level you've shown, it really feeds my soul. (Yes, I do actually HAVE a soul, LOL.)